When a Bipolar Person Ignores You
A Guide on Bipolar Ghosting
If someone ghosts you, does that mean they have bipolar disorder? No. But if you know someone with bipolar disorder is ignoring you, chances are they are exhibiting a period of imbalance. If you’ve ever been ignored or “ghosted” by someone with bipolar disorder, you know how confusing and painful it can feel. You might wonder if you did something wrong or if the relationship is over. The truth is, bipolar ghosting is a real experience for many people, and it usually has more to do with the person’s mental health than with you personally.
This guide will help you understand why people with bipolar disorder might ignore others, what “bipolar ghosting” means, and how you can respond with empathy and care.
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What is Bipolar Ghosting?
Bipolar ghosting happens when a person with bipolar disorder suddenly cuts off communication without warning or explanation. This can mean not answering texts or calls, avoiding in-person contact, or disappearing from social media. For friends and loved ones, it can feel like being shut out for no reason.
Why Does Bipolar Ghosting Happen?
Bipolar disorder is a mental health condition marked by dramatic shifts in mood, energy, and behavior. These changes can make it hard to keep up with relationships, even with people they care about deeply. Here are some common reasons why bipolar ghosting happens. Some of these habits are actually excellent coping mechanisms in creating space for the person:
1. Depressive Episodes
- Low energy and motivation: Depression can make even simple tasks like texting back feel impossible. People may withdraw to protect themselves or because they feel overwhelmed.
- Feelings of worthlessness: They might believe they’re a burden and that others are better off without them, leading to isolation.
- Negative thinking (ie rumination): Depression can cause a person to see themselves and their relationships in a negative light, making them pull away.
2. Manic or Hypomanic Episodes
- Overstimulation: This is actually a sign of maturity and control over ones imbalanced state. Mania brings racing thoughts and high energy. Social interactions can feel overwhelming, so they may withdraw to regain control.
- Impulsivity: During mania, people can make sudden decisions, like cutting off contact, without thinking about the consequences.
- Irritability: Mania can also cause irritability, leading someone to push others away or ignore them.
3. Emotional Overload and Self-Protection
- Overwhelming emotions: Bipolar disorder can make emotions feel much more intense. Ignoring others can be a way to avoid saying something hurtful or to cool down after a conflict.
- Need for space: Taking time away from others helps them regain emotional control before re-engaging.
4. Fear and Shame
- Fear of rejection: Some people worry that others will leave them because of their bipolar disorder, so they pull away first to avoid being hurt.
- Stigma and shame: Feeling ashamed about their condition or believing they’re unlovable can lead to ghosting.
5. Relationship Strain
- Difficulty expressing feelings: It can be hard to talk about complex emotions, especially during mood swings. Ignoring someone may feel easier than trying to explain.
- Conflict avoidance: If upset with someone, they might ignore them instead of facing a potential argument or expressing anger directly.
When They Ignore Because They’re Upset
Sometimes, a person with bipolar disorder may ignore you specifically because they are upset at you. This isn’t just about mood swings—it’s also about coping with conflict:
- Difficulty processing emotions: Intense feelings can make it hard to respond calmly, so they may withdraw to avoid saying something they regret.
- Fear of making things worse: They might worry that talking things out will lead to a bigger fight, so they choose silence.
Setting boundaries: Ignoring can be a way to protect themselves from feeling hurt or disrespected.
How Bipolar Ghosting Feels for Both Sides
For the Person Being Ignored
- Confusion and hurt
- Worry about the relationship
- Feelings of rejection
For the Person with Bipolar Disorder
- Guilt and shame after ghosting
- Regret for hurting someone they care about
- Relief from emotional overload, at least temporarily
What Should You Do When a Bipolar Person Ignores You?
It’s natural to want answers, but remember that bipolar ghosting is usually a sign of what the person is going through, not about you personally. Here are some ways to respond:
1. Practice Patience
Give them space if they need it, but let them know you’re there when they’re ready to talk. Avoid sending repeated messages or demanding explanations.
2. Offer Gentle Support
Send a short, caring message like, “I’m here for you when you’re ready.” Remind them that you care, without pressure.
3. Don’t Take It Personally
Remember, this behavior is a symptom of their illness, not a reflection of your worth. Try not to react with anger or take revenge by ignoring them back.
4. Take Care of Yourself
Support someone with bipolar disorder, but don’t neglect your own mental health. Talk to friends, family, or a counselor if you feel stressed or confused.
5. Respect Boundaries
If they ask for space, respect their wishes. Set your own boundaries if you need to protect your wellbeing.
Bottom Line
Being ignored by someone with bipolar disorder can be painful, but understanding the reasons behind bipolar ghosting can help you respond with compassion. Remember, you’re not alone—many people experience this, and support is available for both you and your loved one.
If you or someone you know is struggling, reach out to a mental health professional. Support, patience, and understanding can make a big difference for everyone involved
References
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